"You know what happens when you get married? You get silverware for free."
Yes... many of us have been there; convincing our single friend that there are reasons to take the plunge. Why we do this has been the topic of many books, movies and probably therapy sessions. As usual, without the full context for the overheard snippet I can only guess at what was behind it.
I have been on both ends of similar conversations many times. It was impossible for me to understand the benefit of marriage when my sister tried to explain it to me years after her own ceremony. All I could see was that 1. much as I did and still do love her huband, she'd ended up with someone I couldn't imagine being married to and 2. all of the rest of her relationships, namely me, had suffered because of it.
Fast forward a few years and there I am, walkign down the aisle myself, totally confident that while my life (and my friends lives) might never be the same, I would be entirely the better for it. And... though I am sure I tried to explain this in my own way to my unmarried friends (and younger sister) it was just as impossible to fully describe the real benefits as it had been when my older sister tried with me.
How do you really describe the feeling of laying next to someone at night who fully understands the day you have just had; who has promised that, even though you may have treated them like, at best, a doormat or at worst, a ghost, that day... still, they will be there in the morning.
Now, I know, this promise can be compromised... certainly not easily for anyone; but I have seen it happen in my family so I know that sometimes the pain of laying there every night next to someone who doesn't feel that way must become too overwhelming. I imagine this is why they say you should never go to bed angry.... it is just too easy to wake up the next morning at the edge of the bed.
But, even with the threat of broken promises we see around us, I would still tell anyone I know, it is worth the risk, if not the silverware. Because.... when you are with that person, that one person whom you love and who loves you back, you can feel and find untapped parts of yourself that will do anything to overcome all challenges, not just the ones to the relationship.
And the best part.... there is someone there to reach way up into the cabinet above the fridge and pull down that silverware that you only see once a year.
Yes... many of us have been there; convincing our single friend that there are reasons to take the plunge. Why we do this has been the topic of many books, movies and probably therapy sessions. As usual, without the full context for the overheard snippet I can only guess at what was behind it.
I have been on both ends of similar conversations many times. It was impossible for me to understand the benefit of marriage when my sister tried to explain it to me years after her own ceremony. All I could see was that 1. much as I did and still do love her huband, she'd ended up with someone I couldn't imagine being married to and 2. all of the rest of her relationships, namely me, had suffered because of it.
Fast forward a few years and there I am, walkign down the aisle myself, totally confident that while my life (and my friends lives) might never be the same, I would be entirely the better for it. And... though I am sure I tried to explain this in my own way to my unmarried friends (and younger sister) it was just as impossible to fully describe the real benefits as it had been when my older sister tried with me.
How do you really describe the feeling of laying next to someone at night who fully understands the day you have just had; who has promised that, even though you may have treated them like, at best, a doormat or at worst, a ghost, that day... still, they will be there in the morning.
Now, I know, this promise can be compromised... certainly not easily for anyone; but I have seen it happen in my family so I know that sometimes the pain of laying there every night next to someone who doesn't feel that way must become too overwhelming. I imagine this is why they say you should never go to bed angry.... it is just too easy to wake up the next morning at the edge of the bed.
But, even with the threat of broken promises we see around us, I would still tell anyone I know, it is worth the risk, if not the silverware. Because.... when you are with that person, that one person whom you love and who loves you back, you can feel and find untapped parts of yourself that will do anything to overcome all challenges, not just the ones to the relationship.
And the best part.... there is someone there to reach way up into the cabinet above the fridge and pull down that silverware that you only see once a year.
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