"This would make a great holiday present."

Really??? I stared at the faux fur hot water bottle and tried to imagine the person who would be excited to find it under their tree on Christmas morning.

On the other hand... gifts are funny that way. Since I was young I've had a knack for picking out completely inappropriate presents: silver jewlery for a friend who's allergic to that metal; a relationship game for a couple on the verge of separation; Harry Potter for a conservative christian family.

It's not like I intend to get it so wrong. It is always done unwittingly; either because I am clueless or just because of fate. Probably, though, it is karmic payback for a critical comment I made about a present when I was 5 years old.

"He bought mom deoderant," I jeered with a giggle to my sister; unaware that my brother was hidden in a nearby rack of clothes, listening to our every word. Needless to say, it took an awful lot of coaxing to get him to come out after that.

I am fairly confident my bad luck with presents goes back to this lapse in judgement. But, while my gift giving may be filled with setbacks, I continue to try anyway. Because, as I learned when my mom opened that present of Secret on a stick, and gave my beleaguered brother a heartfelt hug and kiss, it is always the thought that counts the most.

So, I hope you'll all know that it is with thoughts of a fun and relaxing holiday that I offer my gift to all of my friends and fans... Tomorrow, December 22nd 2011, for that one day, my book, Betting Jessica, will be free on Amazon.com

I'm sorry it is not wrapped:>) but if you haven't read it I hope you enjoy it... or feel free to gift it to somone who would. And a very, very Happy Holidays to you and yours! 

With love, Deanne

... The soft ripple of water streaming down the fountain tiles.

This joyous season of craziness and music and crowds and over-stim has completely destroyed me..... so what better time to sneak in the massage I have desparately needed all year long? I find it funny to write this after my last blog article re: darkness and despair, and yet it makes sense in a weird way. Because, no matter what the escape is, it is especially true at this time of year that stepping out of the daily grind is a very good way to find my own inner light again.

I am a huge fan of massages.... for one thing because my body feels so much better, but for another reason because I have the most interesting conversations with my fantastic masseuse. I am not one of those (usually) who lays there quietly while I am being massaged; especially not with Winter (and with a name like that, of course she is wonderful and artistic). I love talking with Winter about life and about our art; writing for me and music for her.

Today our conversation was partly about how to learn from others artists rather than getting lost in comparisons with them. It is so easy to lose confidence when faced with the amazing talent that surrounds me. But this year I challenged myself to stop avoiding this resource and start learning from it. I joined the Rose City Romance Writers -http://www.rosecityromancewriters.com/) and worked to get more involved with my writer freinds.

There have been many fantastic highlights of this past year for me: going to Italy and publishing my book particularly come to mind. But of everything, the best thing I did for myself this year was to open my heart and brain to the advice, critique and common sense of my colleagues.

And in doing so, when I actually find moments of quiet like at the spa today, their supportive voices fill my mind with promises for the year ahead. Here's to a stellar 2012 for all of us.